My First Blog Post

When this year began I said to myself, “You are the prophet of your own life; what is the scripture you are going to declare over your life for 2017, the year of TOTAL VICTORY?” The scripture that came to mind was,

“Do not remember the former things, nor CONSIDER THE THINGS OF THE OLD. Behold I am doing a new thing, now it shall spring fourth; shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the dessert.”
(Isaiah 43:18-19 NKJV).

I declared this over my life and then did quite the opposite. I didn’t forget the former things. I didn’t “not consider the things of the old”. I actually went back to it instead. I went back to the place of comfort, to the place of familiarity, the place in which I knew how painful the outcome would be. But like the scripture says, “Shall you not know it?” Other translations say, “Shall you not perceive it?” That is the thing — I couldn’t. I wanted to perceive the new thing, but I wasn’t WILLING to do the first part of what it says, forget the past!

I went to a service last week and Bishop Tony Miller was the guest speaker –what an anointed man of God! He brought up the scripture in Isaiah, and he said, “Your ability to perceive a moment determines your ability to enter into it.” WOW! When the year began I couldn’t perceive the moment so I wasn’t able to enter into it. But THANK GOD for His Mercy, His Grace, and His Faithfulness. He didn’t allow me to stay in my mess. He gave me the ability to perceive the moment and it began the night of April 2nd. God was speaking to me from January. He was tugging at me, but the night of April 2nd –I WOKE UP! That night I was informed that a man who was such a General in the Kingdom SUDDENLY went to be home with the Lord. What a shocker! What a lost for a family that I love so much! I couldn’t believe it. I still can’t! My human mind cannot comprehend why that happened. But I am not God, and I know that His plan is perfect, and that is what I allow to bring me peace with what happened. And every time my Pastor says, “My brother brought so many souls to Christ, and through his death so many souls are coming to Christ still” –I begin to weep! Because I am one of those souls that through his death it brought me to Christ on such a deeper level. The whole situation helped me to put things into PERSPECTIVE, to put life into perspective of WHAT REALLY MATTERS! And there were people and things and habits in my life that didn’t matter, there still are. As Prophetess Cynthia Murray said Saturday at breakfast with our single’s group, “We just have to get to a place where we love Jesus more than that person or thing.” Life is short and we have to truly learn how to LIVE and not allow ourselves to remain in situations which bring such PAIN, AGONY, HURT, SIN, and DEATH. I want to walk in the FULLNESS of what God has for me the way I believe Pastor Tony did!

Things happen in our lives that change us, that wake us up, that God will use to put us back on track once again. But then some time passes and EMOTIONS start rising up and we want to go back! Back to the

place of comfort, back to the place of familiarity! But the funny thing is– it is NEVER worth it. The thing or person or situation that God has taken you from hasn’t changed! We sometimes think because some time has passed by, maybe things will be different. BUT NO! It is the same mess, the same pain, the same tears, the same hurt! Don’t Go Back! Do you have faith enough, to stay long enough, for a new door to be opened? Can you “Be still and KNOW that He is God” (Psalm 46:10)? Can you remember why you started? Can you bring yourself back to the reason you left whatever God told you to leave behind? Like Bishop Miller said, “A new thing is not an old thing redressed!” He will do a NEW THING, don’t let the enemy play with your mind! I have to tell myself, I FOUGHT so hard to get to this place! I CRIED myself to sleep for YEARS, I was DEPRESSED for YEARS, I HARMED myself for YEARS, I was so UNHAPPY for YEARS, I didn’t know what the JOY of the Lord was until NOW! I can’t let that go! Because the enemy’s schemes are old, it is nothing new, he is strategic, but we have the ultimate STRATEGY and that is GOD! The enemy doesn’t want me to teach, he doesn’t want me to preach, he doesn’t want me to smile, he doesn’t want people to see what God can do with such a broken soul or how He can truly bring life to dry bones! The enemy doesn’t want ANY of us to walk in the fullness of God! It has cost me much to get to this place, I have given up A LOT to get here, but I owe my life to Jesus! He saved me in ways no one ever could! He loved me more than any lover ever could! He turned my life around!

I don’t know if you find yourself wanting to give up, wanting to go back, but I want to tell you DON’T! DON’T TURN BACK NOW! YOU HAVE GOTTEN TOO FAR, YOUR BREAKTHROUGH IS RIGHT THERE, YOU ARE ABOUT TO ENTER INTO A GOD MOMENT! This is a birthing season, I am about to give birth, you are about to give birth! In the natural YOU can do things that can cause the baby to die even at 8 months or at 9 months! If you don’t listen to the Doctors instructions, to what he tells you to do from this moment on. What is inside of you can DIE! The same goes for in the spirit, don’t do something to cause what God has placed in you to DIE! Listen to God, listen to the Doctor of doctors! The agony, the all of a sudden pain, the uncomfortability and the DISTRESS — it is because you are in Labor! Press Thru, P.U.S.H (Pray Until Something Happens), STAY FOCUSED!!!

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